Musings on this Week

This week has been crazy. I've been running almost non-stop. Been going to bed way too late, so consequently I can't think right. Struggled with feelings of loneliness, discouragement, inadequacy -- all that stuff. I know it's just because I'm super tired and stressed and don't see how it's all going to work out in the end. Work has been stressful - new manager - too many hours. It's just been a weird week.

But, you know, God has still been incredibly faithful. I was feeling pretty down Tuesday morning, and I just cried out to Him and praised Him for all He's done, and shared with Him my struggles, and He came in such a sweet way reassuring me of His love and mercy and grace.

And today, God enlightened me on an issue. Perhaps my discouragement is because my expectations and wishes - don't seem to be getting met. And God seemed to say, "What if this isn't what I want for you right now?" And it just hit me like a ton of bricks - duh - yeah, this is what I'm dreaming/hoping might happen, but what if it is totally not in God's plan? This may seem juvenille, but it was very eye-opening to me. I need to work on aligning my thoughts/wishes/dreams to God's will, whatever that might be, and trusting Him because I know His ways are higher than my ways, and He is eternally looking out for my good. Wow! What an awesome God!

So, God is helping me out of this hole. Need to put some order back into my life. Focus on my priorities - things are looking up.

P.S. One bright spot of this whole week: I'm going to Ireland by God's grace and help!

Mountains

Who: Frank, Charlotte, Alanna, and Andrew and Marty (dad's brother), Tammy, Leanna, Emily, and Abby
What: Family Getaway
When: Friday, September 19 - Sunday, September 21
Where: Smokey Mountains, TN
What happened: Galavanting around Cades Cove, wading in the creek, some hiking and walking, playing games, chatting, playing music, eating, enjoying God's nature, and just being together.
The evidence: See pictures below :)

Why I'm glad I've been w/o power for 3 days:

• a week off from school!
• about 9 hrs. of extra work time at Panera
• lots of chum time with my brother - we said we liked the power being out. We ate together, read together, talked with each other - just enjoyed being together.
• I'm now really really thankful for warm water. Andrew laughed at my screams as I took a cold shower yesterday.
• We talked with one of our neighbors more than we have in a long time. It's amazing what happens when the TV/computer is no longer in the picture.
• We now know that we can survive with our gas/charcoal grill and propane burner. We fried bacon on the burner today for BLT's!
• I'm very thankful for friends who loaned us a generator so we could save our food in our freezer (and at times toast our bread with the toaster).
• I've gotten to enjoy lots and lots of candles.
• God's power never gets shut off. He even had his bright light out for us the last couple of nights.

Why I'm thankful that we now have our power on:

• We can now go to the Smokey Mountains on Friday and not have to worry about our freezer!
• And that shower is going to feel nice too. :)

A Wet Day

My Hair got wet: I was walking out of my house this morning and a very large raindrop splashed in my hair. My umbrella got wet: Katie and I walked around the Eden Park fountain, umbrellas in hand as it softly rained. My skirt/leg/foot got wet: As I was preparing to sit down at lunch, I knocked my glass of water all over my self. See - it was a wet day. And finally my tongue got wet: How, you say? A Wendy's Frosty Chocolate Shake. Wow - it hit the spot.

School is in FULL swing. I've been able to have some "friend" times - watching movies, eating out, and scrapbooking. It's been great, but now I feel the need to really buckle down and get a handle on my pile of homework! And now is the time to get started. So, alas, you probably won't be seeing too much of me the next week- gotta get around to disciplining myself. :P Honestly -another motivator is that the fam is going to the Smokeys on Friday to be with my aunt and uncle and cousins. I'm ready for a little R & R!

Wanted to leave you with some truth about God from Knowledge of the Holy by A.W. Tozer (read the book if you haven't already -- it's amazing; God is amazing!)

On God's Immutability:

"In coming to Him at any time we need not wonder whether we shall find Him in a receptive mood. He is always receptive to misery and need, as well as to love and faith. He does not keep office hours nor set aside periods when He will see no one. Neither does He change His mind about anything. Today, this moment, He feels toward His creatures, toward babies, toward the sick, the fallen, the sinful, exactly as He did when He sent His only-begotten Son into the world to die for mankind" (p. 53).

On God's Divine Omniscience:

"Our Father in heaven knows our frame and remembers that we are dust. He knew our inborn treachery, and for His own sake engaged to save us (Isa. 48:8-11). His only begotten Son, when He walked among us, felt our pains in their naked intensity of anguish. His knowledge of our afflictions and adversities is more than theoretic; it is personal, warm, and compassionate. Whatever may befall us, God knows and cares as no one else can" (p. 57).

On God's Wisdom:

"God has charged Himself with full responsibility for our eternal happiness and stands ready to take over the management of our lives the moment we turn in faith to Him" (p. 63).

"It is as if God were saying, 'What I am is all that need matter to you, for there lie your hope and your peace. I will do what I will do, and it will all come to light at last, but how I do it is my secret. Trust Me, and be not afraid.' With the goodness of God to desire our highest welfare, the wisdom of God to plan it, and the power of God to achieve it, what do we lack? Surely we are the most favored of all creatures" (p. 64).

Oh - I could go on and on sharing portions that stuck out to me. Go get the book if you haven't read it! Trust me! :)

Well - I've got to get to work! Have an awesome weekend! Remember you're blessed and God loves you with an everlasting love.

My New Purchase

On Monday after working a couple of hours at her house, Aunt Brenda suggested that we go over to IKEA to see if I could find a lamp for my room. Isn't she such a cool boss? This was our find:

I absolutely love it! It was exactly what I had envisioned. A bit pricey, albeit, but it's something I'll probably keep for a long time! Just wanted to share! :)

A Little of This & That

And I know, yes I know,

Jesus blood can make the vilest sinner clean

And I know, yes I know,

Jesus blood can make the vilest sinner clean

This morning as we were singing this song, I realized that if this simple chorus was not true, "we are of all men most miserable" (1 Cor. 15:19 KJV). The fact that Jesus' blood can make the vilest sinner clean gives us unspeakable hope and purpose. Wow. I stand in awe of who Jesus is and what He means to me.

*****

I've been reading Knowledge of the Holy by A.W. Tozer and have been eating it up. I think I have highlighting on every page! I'm understanding that I've never really spent too much time really trying to think about who God is. Tozer is so clearly explaining and teaching - it is all so refreshing and wonderful just spending time thinking about God and thinking about what He has revealed to us, His creation, about who He is. I've just read 5 chapters of the book, but I highly recommend the book to anyone whose interested in understanding (in our limited understanding) of who God is.

*****

We just got our copy of the Collingsworth Family DVD that they filmed at Music Hall in Cincinnati. Mom and Aunt Brenda got to go - so she was pointing out where they were sitting, and I'm recognizing people I know. It's pretty cool. Love their harmony and spirit.

*****

Unless I find someone to work my shifts, this week I'm working a CRAZY schedule. I guess communication keeps breaking down that I only want 10-15 hours not the 20 some hours they keep giving me!! So here is my schedule for this week, unless I find a merciful soul willing to work for me!

Monday: Labor Day / Work for Brenda

Tuesday: Panera 7:30 - close

Wednesday: Kingdom Kids at 7:00

Thursday: Panera 5:00 - close

Friday: Panera 4:00 - close

Saturday: Panera 8:00 - 4:00 pm

Sunday: Worship & possibly Main St. Kid's Club

I'm sharing this so A: You can pray that I can get some of the shifts covered or B: God will give me an extra measure of His grace and help to make it through the week. I do want to thank God that I got a shift covered next week so I can go to the TE Scrapbooking get-together! :)

Well signing off - Have a great week everybody!

The Wild Party

Well - it wasn't quite wild, but we partied! Megan, Leanna, Kimberly, Nicole, Tiffany, Paige, Katie and Sarah all came over for a bit of revelry before the school semester "really" began. We had a lovely night enjoying Chili and Cheese Dip and Chips (a Smith household specialty), lots of chatting, some Ping-Pong, and a lively game of Taboo, and finally brownies and ice-cream. It was wonderful being with old friends and making new ones! Many thanks to Andrew, Mom, and Aunt Brenda for all that they did to prepare. It was great fun! And here are the promised pictures!

I'm -

Trying to figure out how to sum my week up in a short efficient way (cuz its 11pm and I have to work at 8:30 pm)!

How about some random but relevent quotes, paraphrases, and mentionings? I know you're intrigued!

• Amazing Grace - Megan, Melissa, and I sang in chapel on Wednesday. God really helped - I marvel at His grace.
• About 11 more months on my car payment! Boy I'll be glad when that balance is $0!!
• The validity of the revival is proven in 2-6 weeks when it's dry and my prayers don't get through, and I'm still steadfastly seeking God. (paraphrase) - Travis Johnson. God help me to keep the spirit of revival, the spirit of constantly seeking you throughout this whole semester, and for that matter, my whole life!
• Hermeneutics - Learning, Loving, Living God's Word - Meredith Moser. I think God is really trying to give me lots of opportunities to get in His Word. Christian Beliefs, Hermenuetics, Bible Methods -- I'm very excited about all of it!
• "Yes, ma'am...yes, ma'am...yes ma'am" - student in the U.C.'s Police Academy. This guy was just being polite, but he totally made me feel awesome and respected!
• "We'll adopt you." - Greg and Sandy aka. Mom and Dad to us at Panera. They're so sweet!

Well, that's the most you're getting out of me tonight! When I get too sleep-deprived, I stop functioning, and I'm getting very near that point! :)

And I apologize - I know it's getting bad when I can't go a week without posting using bullets. And I haven't posted pictures in ages. I'll try to work on that!

Hope everyone has a glorious, and perhaps, "laborless" Labor Day weekend! :)

Day 1

I've been on campus 2 days and it feels like it's been weeks already. The camaraderie I feel with old and new students alike, the desire for God's presence, the challenge to excel academically - if this has been Day 1 (of school) what in the world does God have in store for this year?

I'm anticipating GREAT things, because my God is a GOOD God, and works everything out to our good, to those who love Him and are called unto His purpose.

Lord - This year is Yours. Mold me, break me, make me into the person You want me to be. Help me to always, always put You first, to cultivate and nurture my relationship with You. Grow me, mature me, please don't stop working on me. You are my Savior, Shepherd, Provider, and Friend. I want to know and love You more.

Wrapping up the Week

It's Friday night - let's see how I did with my goals for this week! :P

• Order/purchase books - CHECK
• Portfolio - eeeh, I compiled quite a bit of papers, but haven't written anything new. I do know what I need to write, so that is better than where I was last week!
• Purses and shoes - haven't even touched
• Practice flute - I have "my" school flute, but haven't played it yet.
• Panera - I've worked 25 hrs. this week and have to work 6 hrs tomorrow night! But I'm getting better closing Dining Room. I actually clocked out before 10 pm tonight! My fastest time - thanks to Andrea who mopped while I vacuumed! :) (My fastest time - lol - you can tell I've been watching too much of the Olympics!) :P
• Time with God - It has been wonderful! I've been taking Andrew to school, then coming back and studying my Bible. Today, I fell asleep out on the porch after I read my Bible - but I think God knew I needed a little nap because later Kristen called and asked if I could cover her shift tonight, which I did.

Tomorrow (Saturday) is the softball tournament for the church softball team. I'm glad that they're playing like 2 minutes from my house! Then I have to work tomorrow night. Then off to school for Convocation Services on Sunday, then Junior Year here I come!

My schedule for this semester (finally got it figured out!)

Bible and Theology

• Christian Beliefs
• Hermeneutics

General Education

• Biology Lab
• Computer Applications III
• SWSE
• Choir
• Instrumental Ensemble

Professional Content

• Educating Exceptional Learners
• Bible Methods
• Children's Literature

Did I tell you that I'm excited? I love learning! :P