During the last two months, I've been doing the hardest thing I've ever done. I'm teaching ten second graders at LBA, the Christian elementary school where I attended.
I remember thinking at one point, "It would be cool if I could finish out the year long-term subbing after student teaching..." and here I am.
Teaching has to be the most humbling experience of all, next to parenting. Actually, I think teaching is a type of parenting.
I'm learning so much. It is hard...sometimes so. hard.
But, I keep leaning on the promise that God won't lead me where He won't give me the grace to finish.
I'm confident that God is my good Father and is leading me through this difficult time to prepare me for my future.
I saw this quote on Sarah's blog about her son's first day of school. What a good reminder of my responsibility as a teacher.
"World, take my child by the hand- he starts school today!
It is all going to be strange and new to him for a while, and I wish you would sort of treat him gently. You see, up to now, he has been the king of the roost. He has been the boss of the backyard. I have always been around to repair his wounds, and I have always been handy to soothe his feelings.
But now things are going to be different. This morning he is going to walk down the front steps, wave his hand and start on a great adventure that probably will include tragedy, sorrow and hurt.
To live in this world will require faith and love and courage. So, World, I wish you would sort of take him by his young hand and teach him the things he will have to know. Teach him –but gently, if you can.
He will have to learn, I know, that all people are not just –that all men and women are not true. Teach him that for every scoundrel, there is a hero; that for every enemy, there is a friend. Let him learn early that the bullies are the easiest people to beat.
Teach him the wonder of books. Give him quiet time to ponder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky and the flowers on green hill. Teach him that it is far more honourable to fail than to cheat. Teach him to have faith in his own ideas, even if everyone tells him they are wrong.
Try to give my son the strength not to follow the crowd when everyone else is getting on the bandwagon. Teach him to listen to others, but to filter all he hears on a screen of truth and to take only the good that comes through.
Teach him never to put a price tag on his heart and soul. Teach him to close his ears on the howling mob- and to stand and fight if he thinks he is right. Teach him gently, World, but do not coddle him, because only the test of fire makes fine steel.
This is a big order, World, but see what you can do. He's such a fine litttle fellow."
I walked into devotions Tuesday morning, my mind heavy with a seemingly hopeless situation. Little did I know that I would be sitting at Jesus' feet as He reminded me that with Him, there is always hope. I'm always amazed when God speaks directly to the need of my heart. Sometimes, I forget that He sees the beginning from the end, that He knows me more intimately than anyone else.
"O LORD, You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways. Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, O LORD, You know it all. You have enclosed me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, I cannot attain it." Psalm 139:1-6 NASB
Susan shared so beautifully how hope is like an action verb and faith the noun. Our faith is grounded in who God is; our hope is that joyful expectancy that He will be true to His character. Faith is like the roots of a plant while hope is the stem through which the faith flows. She gave the following acronym:
H - Holding
O - On
P- Praying
E- Expectantly
She then showed us the video of a song by Gungor "Beautiful Things." I've heard the song before, but I heard it in a new way that morning, and it has been in my mind the last few days. Yes - I don't understand everything in my life right now. At times, I feel rather hopeless as if I've done all I can do, but then God reminds me of what He can and is doing. And He makes things new. My hope is in Him.
I copied what I typed in my journal today because today was just too fun. :) And, no, my journals are not usually this long!
Today was just simply a lovely day. :) Actually, the last two days have been lovely. So many awesome things happened that I think I’ll recount them.
Today was “See You at the Pole” day. It was just so awesome seeing all the grades holding hands in big circles and hearing voices, adults and children, praying to God. Teaching school in a Christian school is such an amazing opportunity. Wow!
Upon returning to the classroom, P’s mom came in with two big boxes of doughnuts and cartons of orange juice…and she had some zebra iced ones. So GOOD!
Then we had a fire drill where D and A were fighting over who would be the last student to leave the classroom. Silly kids – don’t they realize that the building could be burning down?! ;)
After the fire drill, Mrs. Tate, the assistant principal, read the kiddos her favorite children’s book called Stephanie’s Ponytail. She was just lovely with the kids. And it never ceases to amaze me of the power of a great book!
After that I began my science lesson which literally lasted about all day! Some days are just like that! We finished up our big book on the life cycle of monarch butterflies. Then we began working on our butterfly books answering “before/after” questions, number life cycle pictures, and writing about the chrysalis stage. After lunch, we were finishing up the book when dear L was ever so patiently yet urgently raising/waving her hand. When I called on her, she excitedly said that some of our butterflies had come out of their chrysalis!! (I knew that actually, but was waiting until a little later on in the lesson to show them, but I’m learning that you have to take the “teaching” moment when it comes!) :) So, we observed and marveled over the new butterflies! We observed them at different times throughout the afternoon. Let’s see, we also had another whole group time where J shared with us some more info about butterflies that he had read in a book. It was so awesome seeing him sitting in the rocking chair sharing about the cool things he had learned yet knowing that he is one of the lowest readers in the class. Wow, all I’m saying, is watch out world, because when reading clicks with Joshua, there will be no stopping him! After observing butterflies (some more) the kiddos wrote about it in their Butterfly Journal. It has been SO fun seeing the cycle happen in “real life!” Oh – Ms. Preston also finished reading Charlie the Caterpillar to the kids. See? Today was practically all science!
We finished the day with some math – working with counters, crayons, and five frames. How fun. :)
So that was my day. Ms. Preston even squeezed in a “life-talk” about their futures, college, and praying about what God wants them to be when they grow up. She is so cool. She told me today, “I think we should knock down that wall and we could team teach next year.” :) She builds me up so much. I think, maybe, I can do this teaching thing.:)
